发布于 2021-10-12 23:49
I lit the lamp
the light filled the room
and I saw clearly
his smile in the winter
“You're back, Eliza.”
"How long have you been here? I mean, how do you know I'll be back?"她对于他在屋里有些吃惊，但很快又冷静下来。她已经想好了，这次回来，只是简单地看看，不带任何感情地，和这个屋子作别。
"All the time, Eliza, since you left."
“No, don't speak. I'm just here to see if everything's alright. And maybe I have something to say. But I don't know what it is.”
“So are you gonna stay——”
“Shut up. I said, I'll never be with you again, Morrison. Never again.”
“Fine, Eliza. Got it. Of course, it's been twelve years. Sometimes I would assume probably you've already find yourself a new boyfriend, or you've already get married.”
"So what about you? Why are you still waiting?"
“Because we've been doing it too many times, break up and make peace, again and over again. So these years I always can't help thinking you would come back, however long it takes.”
"But not any longer, Morrison. Not this time."
“Perhaps it's precisely because that we did it too many times, your leaving didn't worry me too much at beginning, and it remained me the hope that it's just one ordinary time of those uncountable times. As time goes by, I thought of moving on, but the anxiety of one day you might go back to me still confused me and stopped me from getting rid of the life I live all these years, Eliza.”
“But now, Eliza, I'm glad you finally kindly release me from it. I shall give my bless to you.”
“You didn't smoke so heavily.”
“New habit. New life. I thought so. Clearly I failed.”
他吐出一口烟，又看向站在窗边的女子，“But you don't seem change too much, Eliza, how's life going?”
"Can't be better."
“Fine.”男子又吸了口烟，“We've been through a lot together. Thanks for that. It's good to know you're fine.”
“Tea or coffee?”
“Though we broke up, you are still a guest. I should do what a host should do.”
"But you know what I want."
"Iced coffee with milk, fine. Wait a moment."
他诧异地望着这一举动，在他问之前，她一边低头专心搅着咖啡，一边回答：“New habit. New life.”
“What's your plan then?”她忍不住开口问，“Since you know now I won't come back any longer.”
"The life continues. Nothing special, I guess."
"You should go out more and date girls, you're not bad, Morrison, you'll find love again. Then you should settle down soon. Find someone gentle and understanding."
"Do you know, Eliza, it's precisely because you've always been too keen to control my life that I want to leave you. "
“I don't want to control you, Morrison,”她极力压制自己的怒火，“I just hate some of your habits that are not good for you, so I try to change them to make you a better one, and to make us still be together. But you, you're always too stubborn to change it. That's why I decided to leave you for good.”
“Eliza, you know what? Your character really didn't change a bit after all these years. You are still you, I do appreciate that.”
"What about yourself? You don't change at all. Don't ever think of teasing me, Morrison, I don't ask for argument when I decided to walk in."
"So what for?"
"I don't know. What the heck? I'm really not myself today."
"On the contrary, Eliza, you can't be more yourself today. I never feel so real of what you be like until today."
"Stop teasing me, Morrison, please."
"You don't always say please, Eliza. What's the matter?"
"Well then, why don't we have some easy small chat to help you remember what you truly want to say, as you told me when you just walked in?"
"Yeah, I said I might have something to say. But words choked me. I feel so blank."
"Don't worry." 他给她续满咖啡，两手交叠托着下巴，耐心地等着她继续说。“No hurry today.”
"You choose the topic."
"What about the reason we broke up last time?"
“So do you still remember?”
"Of course. That stupid vase."说着她的视线又移到那个花瓶上。那一天的情景又放电影一般浮现出来。
“Yeah, you wanted to put roses in it, while I preferred balloon flowers.”
"It seems you still insist your idea, huh?"她看着空空的花瓶，回头看他。
“Do you know why I don't like balloon flowers?”
"Because its language of flowers is hopeless love."
“So that's what you thought? Oh Jesus, I happen to know another language of flowers of balloon flower, and that is, permanent love.”
“I'm sorry, Morrison.”
"It's rare to hear you apologize, Eliza."
“No, sorry…I think I have to go now.”
“No Morrison, leave me alone.”
"It's okay, Eliza. It's okay. It's been twelve years. Think about it."
“Twelve years!”她喃喃道。“Who knows it's just such a ridiculous misunderstanding!”
"It's fine Eliza."他继续说道，“We both know why we would still get back to each other. Though we have some reasons to hate but there're always something we love and be attracted to each other.”
"So that's why I'm here? After all these time?"
"Maybe yes, Eliza. Evething just passed so let go of it."
“There, there.”他轻轻上前一步拥住她，“So now would you tell me what you want to say to me when you just walked in?”
"I love you."她哽咽着说道，"not news, but truth."